I have ugly feet. That is a statement of fact, not just my personal opinion. Of my many short comings, there are those that I try to work on and those that I don't ... obviously, my feet fall into the second category. I've played sports requiring cleats since I was seven... what do you really expect? That in mind, if you're ever traveling in an area that has mosquitoes, and you get bit on the ankle (numerous times), begin to see swelling and still decide "ah, I'm sure it'll be fine" ...then you're an idiot. That's right ladies, 6'2" and 190lbs of talk, dark and jackass. To make matters worse, this kind of thing has happened before ...once after a spider bite in South Carolina and another time after another spider bite in Japan (try playing charades with a Japanese doctor to explain "bite" and "spider" ..."wait, you bit yourself?" ..."what, a snake did this?!").
(Act I, Scene I: *Curtain up* The scene takes place in the deep jungle. It's dark, the only exception is a burning cigarette in the mouth of a camoflaged soldier. Next to our hero are his rifle, an empty MRE and sandbags piled around a fox hole. It's hot here, the kind of heat that drains a man of his will to live. In the distance you can hear helicopters). "We were one-week out of base camp when all hell broke lose. The mosquitoes, err... enemy was relentless. The further into the jungle we went for cover ...only caused them to double, then triple their effort. We were ambushed while 'zip-lining'. The rest of my team made it out, but I was left behind... you see, once you're bit, the enemy knows they have you. All your comrades can do it leave you and hope that you can limp your dumb-ass around town without too much pain. Two days later the swelling started. Does it really all end here in the jungles of Guatemala?" (End scene. *Curtains down*) Stay tuned for Act II, where Dennis Hopper gives his "do you know that 'if' is the middle word in 'life'" ('Apocalypse Now' reference)...academy award, here I come.
(Back to reality) Lisa Escobar is an RN, so I asked her professional opinion. "I'm not so worried about the swelling, but the fact that its warm to the touch and turning colors isn't good". Maybe she's right, but I'm sure I'll be fine... by the time we made it to Tikal two days later, walking was painful at best, I was running a temperature and only wrapping my foot/ankle tightly with an ace-bandage kept the whole thing from swelling so much that it became immobile. "Josh, you're an idiot" you might say. But I say "don't judge so fast", I mean, untreated it will only impede my ability to walk for the next two weeks or so... no big deal, right? The guy that worked the hotel desk, bar, restaurant and internet service in Tikal wanted to know what would cause so much trouble. I kept telling him "mosquito", but he just stared at me with a confused look on his face. Assuming that my Spanish was the problem, I quickly told him that it must have been either "hormigas" (ants) or "pulgas" (fleas). This caused even more confusion on his face. Turns out the word for 'mosquito' in Spanish is (get this) "mosquito" ...maybe he was just worried that I'd die before paying for our room?
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